Health Hacks for the Over 60s

Here are some simple life hacks:

1. be kind to yourself 💖
2. eat when you're hungry 😛
3. do something creative every day 💃 🎶
4. don't get bitter 😞
5. keep your feet happy 👣
6. drink lots of water 💧
7. get at least 30 minutes of exercise a day! 🏃
8. be alone at times but be with people too 👭
9. call your kids 👪
10. do fun things 😀

Well, those aren't really health hacks as we know  and read about them on the internet. "This amazing fruit will keep your skin clear for 90 days!" and all that. But they are basic rules that we forget about over time, and so simple to remember!

Yesterday I had a little meltdown and here's why: Okay, first of all, it's been a hell of a week. Just saying. World news was compounded over here by a humungous flood-style rain, then ice, then freezing rain, then snow. So it was hard to get around. 

I run a cafe with my son, who's obviously half my age. Business has been picking up, in spite of the provincial government's effort to kill small businesses. So I've been busy, and it's the two year mark of a pandemic that none of us planned for. I've noticed that every so often everyone I know, at different times of course, has a small Covid breakdown where the big existential questions come to the fore.

It's been a weird two years though, that's for sure. Our family got together in November, and in the week that we were all together - all five kids and four of their "others" - three of the daughter-in-laws lost someone close to them, and not an ancient old great-aunt either. I've had a series of friends with pretty shitty health problems, one got hit by a car...who gets hit by a car??? And three members of my family had serious ruptures with very close friends. 

So there ya go, and I don't think we are special. It's been a hell of a ride. So anyway, yesterday, I drove home in the snowy ice and backed my car into a snowbank in our driveway from which I could not extricate myself because the snow was on top of three inches of ice.  I never get stuck! I've been driving since I was 18 and I'm a damn good driver! My son helped me get out and I was PISSED. And scared.

Scared? Later in the evening, I was definitely hangry but I just melted down. Because the incident with the car scared me into thinking that I was turning into a weak old lady with none of the strength and sass that I've always had. Driving badly, getting weaker, losing my hearing, maybe even losing my marbles.

It's like being a teenager: you don't know what's happening and you're worried it's going to be fatal. And it is going to be fatal, of course. So I start thinking about how much I can fit into the next thirty years, if I live to 95, and how I would have done things differently, and I go down a rabbit hole of doubt and despair. I look at myself in the mirror, and I'm not young any more! And I wonder how that happened, and why. My dog's snout is all white as she, too, ages. 

Follow my rules: be kind to yourself 💖, eat when you're hungry 😛, do something creative every day 💃 🎶, don't get bitter 😞, keep your feet happy 👣, drink lots of water 💧, get at least 30 minutes of exercise a day! 🏃, be alone at times but be with people too 👭, call your kids 👪, do fun things 😀.

Running Memories

I'm so fortunate to be able to run. Here are some running memories.

 

Lying Fallow

I've had times in my life where I've been lying fallow, waiting for the next cycle to begin. I think I'm just coming out of one of those times. I may have seemed busy, either to myself or to others, but the busyness was a superficial activity like the microbial activity on the surface of the earth. 

In a way, I think I was lying quietly, waiting to capture something that can't be captured. That elusive prey was a feeling of belonging, of being recognized and acknowledged. I lay so quietly, wanting that thing, that I started to forget who I was. So I started to be someone else, who I really wasn't.I started saying yes when I meant no, and no when I meant yes.

Living through the pandemic has thrown many of us into looking more carefully at our lives and our choices. I've been noticing weird parallels and similarities between my life and choices and other people's - people who I would never have admitted a similarity to had it not been for this dramatic event we are all living through.

I went to the desert a few weeks ago. I love it there. I would move there tomorrow if ... 

I love the clean-ness of the air there, not clean in the environmental, physical sense (although it does seem quite fresh), but clean almost in a spiritual sense. The wind blows, the sand moves, the bunnies jump around, the desert truly and clearly doesn't give any indication that it cares about you or notices you, in the sense that you can't anthropomorphize it like a shady tree or a sweet babbling brook.

So the desert gave me a chance to strip myself (figuratively, folks) naked and ask myself: who am I? 

The pandemic has given everyone this opportunity: a chance to be alone, to ponder, to daydream, to change our "normal". Have we done so? No, we have not. 

But one thing the desert always shows us is that there's always another morning, when the wind is blowing and the sand moves lightly. It's not too late to wake up and make a move. It's not too late to recover the land that has been lying fallow. It's scary, though. To be honest with yourself. To say what you believe. To engage in a discourse with others, instead of either deleting people (guilty) or falsely agreeing with them (guilty).

Well, my answers to that age-old question (who I am) were not super clear. The desert doesn't actually give you the answers, it just gives you the peace and quiet so you can try to figure them out. 

• I'm a woman 👩
• I'm a wife 👰
• I'm a mother 💞
• I'm a runner 🏃
• And a Grandmother!!!! 💓

And then there are all the microscopic things that we add on, like extra toppings on the pizza: midwife, writer, cafe owner, saxophone and clarinet player, traveler. I'm good at Trivial Pursuits. I don't like green peppers. I was shocked by the Liberal's reaction to the demonstrations in Ottawa. I don't mind breaking rules if I think they're unjust. I have three Pfizer vaccines in my body. 

Maybe fallow is the time we can separate fact from fiction: separate those things we do "just" to impress others from the things that we do instinctively. Or even the things that we do to impress ourselves, even those things can be recognized by the harsh light of the desert. 

Now is a time in our world when we are moving further and further away from each other. We are drawing thicker and thicker lines between ourselves and amongst ourselves, with little chance of repair. It's time to take some breaths and lie down. Feel the earth under you. Remember what's real. Remember what's true.

Foot Self-Care

 

Did you know your foot has 26 bones, 30 joints and more than 100 muscles, tendons and ligaments? Feet are wonderful appendages, and they keep us going where we want to go. The big toe has magical properties that keep our bodies balanced when we walk, stand or run. Every small part of the foot is kind of a miracle, as far as I can figure, and it's up to us to be kind to our feet.

As we get older, our whole bodies sag. This is true, don't try to deny it. When I look at my little grandson, I marvel at his elastic, ecstatic skin, and his ability to move in all sorts of ways that become more difficult the older we get. I look at the skin of my daughters-in-love and I marvel at their smooth, unblemished skin and their white sclera (my eyes got yellowish because I love the sun and didn't ever wear sunglasses).

Our feet don't really sag ... well actually they do a little bit. They get wider, and our arches may get a little lower and closer to the earth. Sometimes our toes start to spread in intriguing ways. But I'm all about accepting the peculiar shapes of the older female body, and my mission is to figure out how to keep my body running smoothly while I'm still situated in it.

So, one thing I like to do is to offer my feet some regular love. I'm pretty hard on the old gals: I am on my feet all day (9-4) at my cafe, then I like to run as long and as often as I can. This all leads to my fascia getting a little stretchy and sore, my feet getting calluses, and those 26 bones feeling a little sore, especially after a long run on snow and ice.

What to do?

Examine your feet.  👣What do you not like about them? Some things you can fix, and others you have to accept (are feet like life?). 

Foot issues you can fix at home: 

•  👣dry or ravaged skin around the ball of your foot, heel or anywhere
•  👣bunions
•  👣fascia issues

Foot issues that may need professional help:

•  👣chronic Plantars fasciitis: go to the doctor and get this condition properly diagnosed. 
•  👣chronic Athlete's foot: prescription meds may be the answer
•  👣pain that doesn't go away: all sorts of issues can give you pain that doesn't seem to pass, including over-training, badly-fitted shoes, osteoporosis, and other conditions. So if you have pain that isn't reacting to any of your home treatments, get it checked out.

For dry or cracked skin, I love to give my feet a home spa treatment. Fill a basin with very hot water and your favourite oil. Then watch your favourite show, read a book, knit, or daydream. When the water is cold, carefully dry your feet. Now you can start doing the less fun job of scraping off the old skin, cutting your nails, and rubbing down calluses with a pumice stone. Paint your nails if you want! 

Every so often, I'll give my feet a foot mask. And I also like to remember to moisturize my feet before bed (but I usually forget 😂).

Bunions sound weird and they are usually a side-effect of ageing. It's when your big toe joint moves away from the rest of your foot, and makes your big toe turn in to crowd out the other toes. It can be painful, especially after a long run. I got some toe spacers - these are excellent but you have to be disciplined and use them regularly. Start off ten minutes a day when you're relaxing, then move to wearing them when working out. You will find that your bunions shrink, and they're also good for fasciitis and increasing foot strength.

The fascia is a gooey/ membraneous material that surrounds most of our muscles, organs and inner bits and pieces. Sometimes, the fascia surrounding our feet and holding the many bones, tendons, ligaments and muscles in place becomes irritated and painful. If you have a look at this website  you will see another explanation of the fascia: that it isn't a membrane that holds everything together, but it's actually the basic material of the body from which muscles, organs and all the soft squishy parts of our bodies spring. Whatever the case, if you have a pain in your foot, you can try toe spacers, massage, rest, and also rubbing the sole of your foot with a tennis ball or (better) one of these things: 

no it's not a Covid molecule. 

These are spiky rubber balls that you can give your feet a lovely massage with, or just put it on the floor and rub your feet back and forth when your sitting.

Love your feet! You don't have to spend a lot of money on them, but remember that they do need care, and that usually problems can be resolved if you catch them quickly and spend time on them. Rest is so important! So is moisture! Be kind to those funny appendages that help you run, walk, stand and keep balanced. 

♡∫

Competitive Spirit

The first official running race I participated in was this one: a half marathon (21 kilometers), when I had just turned 59. I loved everything about it! The camaraderie; the cups of water; the corny posters; the feeling that I couldn't do it and then I did!

I still love running races. I've done a bunch of them since then. The first in-person one I did since the beginning of Covid was last October. My smile lasted about two kilometers, when I lost myself in the joy of hearing all those other runners' feet pitter-pattering in front, beside and behind me. Then my self caught up with me and I spent the next two hours or so agonizing about my life and all the things that were going wrong and have gone wrong in the past.

Am I an impostor? Was the main question I kept asking myself. The jury is still out on that one. Because here's the thing: as soon as I say I'm anything, especially these days as the social media is ready to pick up and amplify any little piece of horse shit that escapes my mouth, as soon as I say I'm a midwife or a caring person or whatever, a witch and the like, then .... then I am that. And I necessarily have to be the BEST at whatever it is I've said I am.

And if I'm not the best, then I'm an impostor.

We live in an age of experts.

Experts, apparently, study stuff. They know about stuff and they can tell other people how to do things. But there are so many, many experts out there it's hard to know who to believe. So a regular person just finds the expert they agree with and build a game plan from there. But that leads to some difficulties: first of all, you can't just pick any expert. Some people do actually know more than others about any given subject. As a lay-trained midwife, I know that I don't have as much technical knowledge as an OBGYN... so I shouldn't represent myself in opposition to them. But I do, or rather, we do ... we seem to be living in an age when we are all projecting images of ourselves that are larger than life, and better than the puny reality.

The second difficulty with finding an expert to guide you on your way is the problem of responsibility. If you're following an expert's advice and things go sideways, who are you going to blame? Yourself? I don't think so. If you've already decided that you need an expert to help you do whatever it is that you want to do, then you've already given them some degree of responsibility. 

So, if we do away with experts? Well, no one is going to do brain surgery on themselves I hope. But maybe we could tweak the idea a little bit. Maybe we could add some humility to the picture. Perhaps we could reduce our need for experts, trust ourselves a little more, and remember that living life isn't actually like running a race. No one really wins: it isn't really about the survival of the fittest.

Maskne? You're kidding me...

 I'm not even going to post a picture here because I'm so ashamed of how my face looks. Yes, it's that bad. And, yes, maskne is a real condition. If you're interested, the New York Times did an article on it so you can read up on it and try to prevent it. Basically, it's caused by the build-up of all that your facial pores don't need (bacteria, oil, sweat, dirt, possibly some fungi ... all that good stuff), which gets trapped on your skin because ... because you're wearing a mask. 

I wear a mask every day at my cafe. I leave my house around 8am, get the Metro with my mask on, and get to work, and my face is covered from then until I get back home. That's a long time to have a fabric covering over my face, and I'm paying for it now.

Don't get me wrong, I believe that this virus is real, and that vaccines work, and that wearing a mask works too. I worked in health care for long enough to know that in situations where you don't want bacteria or viruses to spread from your mouth, you wear a mask. So that's not an issue, whether I agree with the effectiveness of the damn thing.

No, my issue is that I have been struck bad with the Maskne, and I'm feeling like I'm 13 again.

• I'm very self-conscious about my face. I like putting on a mask, or wearing concealer, so that no one will notice the awful rash around my nose and mouth.
• I almost don't want to go out. I feel like people will talk about me.
• Even worse, my self-consciousness has spread to other areas: I can't cook; I look stupid (my clothes are old and drab); I am too slow; my hearing loss bothers people; I'm not a good mother/granny/midwife..... the list goes on. Oh, and I'm fat. Ridiculous.

The only time I don't feel this way is when I'm out running, because honestly, who cares what you look like when you're having fun? People will notice my rashy face and what? They'll say "oh look at that 65 year old lady out for a run at 7:30 in the morning, what awful maskne she has". Yep.

 As we get older, there is more pressure to perform, not less. Because old people aren't valued simply because they have been on the planet for longer, and they've experienced more ... well, they've experienced more experiences, good and bad, beautiful and ugly.... so, because we aren't valued for that, there is a huge pressure to prove ourselves in many ways. The one who keeps on working; the one who runs the fastest and the farthest; the one who is the best grandma ever; the one who can afford to support his whole extended family ... you get the picture.

So, for me, this rash on my face has brought up all sorts of worries about whether I was true to myself, and I did what I was supposed to do, and was I good enough as a mother, a midwife, a wife, a friend, a daughter, a sister.... a citizen, an anarchist, a revolutionary, a witch ... 

It's funny what a few little zits can do to a gal's psyche!

Friends

I've been going through some transformations recently, and I've been feeling a little like I did when I was 13 or so... wondering how to navigate the next chapter in my life, super annoyed with everyone and everything, but moved to tears by small beautiful things. 

I've tried to treat myself like one does a newborn, moving slowly and taking care. I've had some huge moral joltings in my life over the past few months, and I've been taking stock and realizing that our small moments with friends are one of life's most important pleasures.

There is something immensely comforting in the fact that I've kept in touch with one friend for 55 years, and two others for 50 years, and I know that I can call or write and we will be back to being ten, fifteen, or fifty. And I love the fact that even as I age, I'm still making new friends.

One thing 2020 taught me was that I am much more of an introvert than I thought. I'm happy to muddle through on my own, and I don't hanker after being sociable. I love to run long distances on my own, to think my thoughts. I love chatting with myself about all the questions and worries I have in my mind.

But of course, I'm not the best person to turn to when I want someone else to talk to, someone else's experience and wisdom to learn from, someone else to have fun with and compare notes on this weird journey we call life.

So here's an idea: if you read this (and I know there are a few of you who will), take a minute to call or send a message to a friend. It will make them happy!