Grateful for X?

Sometimes, that is the question. It's not about being an ungrateful person, just that sometimes things don't seem sweet.

I'm grateful for X today. Not certain what it is, but I'm sure there's something. If I name it I might jinx it, so I won't say it. I won't name that elusive X that I am grateful for.

What's so important about being grateful, anyway? I'm not planning on going down the privilege rabbit hole right now. I'm talking about a more profound reason to be thankful. What does that feeling do to our souls? What does it do to our bodies? Our minds?

Is it even a good thing to be grateful? What am I doing when I'm "being grateful"? I'm feeling a feeling of .... of what? contentment? No, not really.

Am I feeling happy that I have something that someone else doesn't have? Am I comparing myself to someone else?

How else would I know that I was grateful? Am I saying thank you for having something? Who or what am I thanking?

I am grateful to be alive. I'm grateful for my health. I'm grateful for having five kids and a husband. I'm grateful for the love I feel around me.

Why though? What makes me grateful? Is it all just a big ole hoax?

So ... what do y'all think?

Thank You

I just want to say thank you to all the women who have invited me to attend their births over the past fifteen years. It has been an honor and a pleasure to accompany you through this important time of your life.
And if we only met once when you were in labor, and I rubbed your back but didn't understand your language, thank you. And if I've seen your first child born, and your second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth and seventh, thank you. And if I caught your baby when no one else was around, thank you. And if you gave birth in an hour and a half, thank you. And if I was with you for three days, thank you. And if I held you when you cried, thank you. And if I spoke to you for hours and you birthed in another city, thank you. And if you had a vaginal birth after a surgical one, thank you. And if you had a cesarean to save your baby's life, thank you.
Thank you.